This week, several hikers in the Virginia area claimed to have spotted the legendary bigfoot. Even more unbelivable was the assertion that the creature was carrying a satchel full of cash! After the Virginia State Police tip line (as well as the producers of "Ripley’s Believe it or Not") were flooded with phone calls, a more down-to-earth explanation was offered: Linda Tripp won the lottery..

You may recall Tripp. She was the Defense Department worker who secretly recorded her phone conversations with Monica Lewinsky (after Lewinsky tried to get her to perjure herself). Ex-president (and current scumbag) Bill Clinton (and his misogynistic campaign staff) went to great lengths to discredit Ms. Tripp. Eventually, she was humiliated when her personnel file at the Defense Department was leaked to the press (in a textbook Clinton play). After five long years, Ms. Tripp (not to be confused with one of the Banana Splits) has finally received what she is owed – money (and lots of it). This week, she received over $550,000. All jokes aside, we wish her well.