Immediately following the 9/11 attacks (after a very brief period of mourning and candlelight vigils) liberals en masse quickly focused their efforts on "asking questions" of those who would attack us. Their questions, such as "Why do they hate us?" were nothing more than a fishing expedition in hopes of finding an answer in line with their politcal agenda ("Bush stole the election," "Bush is too close to big oil," or "Bush isn't gay-friendly enough"). As you may recall, Bill Clinton went out of his way to blame The Crusades and slavery (instead of his repeated refusal to accept bin Laden's head, when it was offered to him on a silver platter). Not to be outdone, Senator Patty Murray said the attacks were due to America's lack of building "day care centers" in that part of the world.

After two years, it has become apparent (even to "progressives") that the reasons we were attacked are (1) We're not Islamist enough, (2) We don't put our women into burquas, and (3) We allow a "mom in tennis shoes" to exist (much less run for senate). Bush's ongoing War on Terror (which has continued despite setbacks and scathing criticism coming from the sleeper cells and their apologist democrats in our midst) has solidified the public's perception of him as a "real leader," and has boosted his popularity. As a result, most liberals are now ANGRY at the 9/11 hijackers.

 

"This sucks, dude!" lamented Seth Dylan Jared (vocal Kucinich supporter). "I've spent the last two years making excuses for the Islamic Freedom Fighters, but Bush's popularity just keeps going up." Howard Dean's campaign manager, Megan Butterfly Cuntface, was more blunt. "This is bullshit! We're through asking phony introspective questions, waiting for answers we'll never get. We've been as anti-Semitic, anti-Israel, and quite frankly anti-American as possible. We've even ignored the Muslim policy of subjugation of women and instead called Bush the 'patriarchal enemy of women.' The Islamic Freedom Fighters have NOT held up their end of the bargain, and their lack of recent attacks on America has made Bush look STRONGER. As far as I'm concerned, they can go straight to hell!"

 

In response to the tirade, al Qaeda spokesman Mohammed Goatfucker said "How dare you talk to me like that, woman! Once we establish a global Islamic state, I will personally cut out your tongue! You democrats are the ones who have not lived up to YOUR end of the bargain. The agreement was that you would first get the Patriot Act revoked, and THEN we could attack more American cities."

 

This argument continued in our office for several hours, after which time we had to end the interview and go home. Both parties have agreed to settle their dispute on Judge Judy. Check local listings.