But long before these crap-can ad campaigns came along, there were other advertising trends (which are surprisingly still around). Since these horribly unfunny (and goddamn annoying) ads still exist, it means that SOMEONE is still buying this crap. Stop It! Here's what to look for:

 

"This ain't your FATHER'S" (this or that) i.e. "This ain't your father's vaginal cream!"

 

"The Mother of All" (this or that). This one was old ten years ago. I don't think in the 1940's Madison Avenue thought it would be cute to run ads featuring famous Hitler quotes. Why should Saddam Hussein be any different?

 

".... I just saved a shitload on my car insurance." God, these ads are annoying. I once checked out Geiko. They couldn't save me a dime. I wouldn't mind it so much, but the ads are irritating, thoroughly unfunny, and we can see them coming a mile away." Stop it already.

 

"Got ____?" Ok, the Aaron Burr "Got Milk" one was good. That was a decade ago, and it just isn't funny anymore. I've seen more variations of this commerical than Jesse Jackson has illegitimate children. The next time I see someone with a "Got Pot," "Got Jesus," or "Got AIDS?" bumper sticker, I'm ramming your fucking car into a ditch! Be forewarned.

 

Commercials which feature a "tough" mom "fighting" menstrural cramps. These women look into the camera, arms folded, and have little captions under them which say things like "Takes no prisoners." What the fuck does that mean, exactly? And please, stop showing commercials which feature attractive women replacing a flat tire or fixing a car. Who do you think you're kidding?

 

 

Any placebo fake "cure" for a cold. It's been scientifically proven that Echinacea doesn't do shit. Now there's some "cure" that has supposedly been invented by an elementary school teacher. You've gotta be shitting me, Pyle. Sure, Greg Brady needs the work, but you're a 'tard if you fall for this nonsense.

 

Any commerical which features a woman sitting on the floor (or on her front steps) eating her breakfast. Are you trying to tell me that the box of Grape Nuts cost so much that he had to sell her dining set?

 

Commericals which feature a smooth-talking person, followed by a record scratching, then a loud obnoxious voice. Example (Boring Voice): In the history of women's wear, the bra has always been - SCREEECH!! (Loud Monster Truck Rally Voice): Well not anymore! Introducing new Bally Sports Bras! This ain't your great great grandfather's bra!

 

Local radio traffic reports which feature The Jetsons music or sound effects in the background. Jeezus, how unoriginal....

 

"Carreer" ads aimed at Jerry Springer fans. "How would you like a rewarding and fulfilling career in the wonderful world of Working Inside A Building?" God, there are some losers out there (and I was at home sick when I saw the ad, so don't write in).