This year Depp played swashbuckling faggot Captain Keith Richards in the oh-so-overhyped "Ass Pirates of the Carribbean." His next movie (due to be released next month) is called (no kidding) "Neverland," probably an ode to Michael Jackson or some such shit.

 

In addition to being an (actually decent) actor (and when he isn't brooding and looking 'pretty' for the camera), Depp has spent much of his free time living in France and saying how ashamed he is that he's an American. Like shit-for-brains Ashton Kutcher, Depp was rather proud of being an American immediately following the September 11th attacks, but eventually joined the other side when America started fighting back. I guess the only good American is a dead American. Calling America a "broken toy," and a "dumb puppy" in a recent interview with a Kraut magazine, Depp again did an about-face (claiming he was 'misquoted' by the magazine) just in time for the debut of his shortlived film "Once Upon a Time in a Mexican." Let's all pray to Jesus that he finally doesn't get cancer from all those cigarettes he's been smoking on and off screen for so many years. Oh yeah, and that his 'wife' doesn't get breast cancer, leaving their bastard kids to fend for themselves (for that would be wrong). Don't worry, Michael Jackson (also very popular in France) would take good care of 'em (that is, IF Depp ever did die prematurely, which we certainly pray doesn't happen. In fact, I would gladly give my life for his, like so many of his mouth-breathing, no-lifer fans would. Please God, take ME instead!!!).