With the election only five months away, I have decided to come up with another much-needed program. I would like to propose the Americans with Inabilities Act. Over a decade ago, President George HW Bush signed into law the Americans with Disabilities Act. Although it has now become nothing more than a cash cow for fat people, I would like to take it one step further.

The Americans with Inabilities Act is designed to serve the majority of the American population: people who have an inability to get their fat asses off the couch and go to the gym, the inability to use an apostrophe, or the inability to accept responsibility for fucking up their own lives. That last one really hits home. It's the basis for many of our current problems. Case in point - Ronald Reagan's body isn't even cold yet, and already the members of gay rights groups are kicking the corpse. They're whining and caterwauling about how it was REAGAN'S fault that AIDS was so prevalent in the 1980's. Here's an excellent example of the type of people who would never point the finger at their own community. If I were to come up with the right wording for the Americans with Inabilities Act, these guys would probably vote for me.

 

Let me say this up front. I have nothing against gay people. I don't happen to have any friends that are gay (as far as I know), but it wouldn't bother me in the least. That being said, I'm not willing to excuse someone from his or her own bad behavior, no matter how horrific the consequences of their behavior may be. If someone gets drunk and crashes into a tree, I'm not going to blame it on the president. If a teenage slut starts whoring herself out to her school, it's not Bill Clinton's fault (unless he's one of the Johns).

 

Take a look at this section from the above linked article:

 

 

Dr. Conant claims that President Reagan deliberately avoided this topic, thus causing thousands of gay men to get AIDS and die (because they seemingly didn't know how AIDS was spread). I've got three points on this. First, by 1982, EVERYBODY knew that AIDS was primarily a homosexual disease spread by anal sex with other men. I was in high school, and even I knew this. Secondly, doesn't Dr. Conant feel the least bit responsible for his friends and patients dying of AIDS? Forget about Reagan for a second. Don't you think that the good doctor might have mentioned what causes AIDS to at least one of his friends or patients back then? And don't you think it would have had more weight coming from a doctor? Finally, a majority of the men who died of AIDS in the early to mid-1980's were infected in the late 1970's. Ronald Reagan's silence on the issue did not make one bit of difference.

 

Of course, if President Reagan had come out and said AIDS is caused by men sodomizing other men, blood transfusions, and using dirty syringes, he would have been accused of showing "hatred" towards gays. Since I'm only a pretend 'tard, I'm not falling for it. I don't think you should, either. I'd like to take this time to prove once and for all that so-called "education" is not the silver bullet for AIDS (or anything else). Here are some facts:

 

AIDS is spread through unprotected anal sex and by using dirty needles

 

AIDS is also spread by blood transfusions (if the blood is contaminated)

 

Smoking cigarettes causes lung cancer

 

Having unprotected sex with a woman may result in pregnancy

 

Drinking a case of Corona then driving will likely cause you to crash

 

Eating too much and not exercising will cause you to get fat

 

Voila! There - I've just educated thousands of people. From this point on, nobody who has read the above messages will get AIDS, lung cancer, or an unwanted pregnancy. Furthermore, my advice on weight loss will solve our national obesity problem. Right? Unfortunately, wrong. Just knowing something is bad does not stop it. It's not that easy.

 

We all know how to get AIDS, and yet people still engage in the behavior that causes them to get it. In fact, in the San Francisco Bay Area (and you're not going to like me pointing this out), many gay men deliberately try to get AIDS. They see it as "hip," and a "badge of honor." I suppose that's somehow Reagan's fault as well.

 

AIDS is a terrible, horrific, deadly disease. People in this country know damn well how it is spread, yet many people continue to make the decisions which lead to them getting it. I don't think AIDS is "God's revenge." That's just a red herring anyway (to make anyone who talks about personal responsibility look like a "right wing religious zealot"). Once again, I have to call bullshit to that.

 

AIDS is a disease which is spread through blood contact. Nothing more, nothing less. Throwing more money at it won't stop it. Neither will removing any negative social stigma attached to it. There are men who deliberately seek out the disease to show their community they're "cool." Again, I'm a libertarian. Do what you want, how you want, with whom you want. Just don't lay your fucked up life at the feet of Ronald Reagan (or me). He probably doesn't care. And quite frankly, neither do the rest of us. Now get back to work.